#31WriteNow: Happy Birthday, Bro.

At 5pm, I submitted my final project for my graphics class and thus completed my last class of the summer session. Check out some of my graphics work at this link.

After a long day of class, my grad program cohort and I went out to eat some Korean food and sing some karaoke.

Screen shot 2013-08-10 at 1.50.27 AM

The different dishes for our meal

I had a blast this evening. Eating delicious food and singing upbeat songs helped me forget about how long today had been. But it didn’t let me forget what today is.

Today is August 9th, my older brother’s birthday. He would have been 26 years old. Sometimes, I wonder what he would have looked like today if he would lived past the age of 15. I wonder if he’d have had a steady girlfriend. Wonder what career he would have picked and where he would be living. Wonder how his facial hair would have grown in. Wonder if he’d still be making people smile.

All I can do is wonder until I see him again one day. I miss him and lament the fact that so many people in my life are unaware that he once existed. I didn’t bring up my brother’s birthday even one time (other than on Twitter) today because it’s a reality I like to push into the back of my brain. But here in the privacy of my room, I let my guard down and the memories of he and I come flooding back to me. As painful as they are, I am glad they’re still there. They’re a reminder that he once existed. If not for those memories, it’d be as though I made up that charmingly mischievous boy. Although we had Tonbara with us for only 15 years, I am grateful for every second we had.

Happy 26th Birthday, Tonbara!

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